Last summer, after a long hesitation, I tried meditation for the first time.
I had read and heard about it countless of times but never really understood how to do it or really believed it works. Sitting still and just breathing sounded like...doing nothing useful.It took me a while to understand that's the whole point.
I wanted to write about meditation now, because I didn't have time to meditate for two weeks. There was moving house, new schedules, travelling, stress and other excuses. And now I really feel the difference regular meditation can make and what happens if I stop.
I started to meditate every morning, first only five minutes at a time. Sitting my back straight, hands on my sides and just concentrating on breathing. I fill my lungs completely counting to five and then expire slowly to empty the lungs as far as possible. If any thoughts come to my mind, I just accept them and concentrate on breathing again. And again. Meditation is being conscious of every moment and feelings in the body while concentration on breathing, the very self-evident function we are not aware of.
In stressful situations people tend to breathe superficially. This has a direct connection to our body and brain: it prevents us to think clearly and act calmly. The more we are conscious of our breathing, the more we also live in the moment and are aware of our body and thoughts.
I started to notice the difference after some weeks of persistent meditation. I caught myself more and more in situations when I was daydreaming, over-stressing or thinking in a certain way. I became more conscious of my thoughts. I was able to calm down in stressful situations like driving a car in heavy traffic. And this was an amazing change. Before I was always panicking in the chaotic Brussels car jungle. Also I was more calm in public situations. I was able to make presentations in the university and think clearly at the same time, whereas before I forgetting words and not even talking about blushing.
Now, when I didn't meditate for two weeks, I feel more nervous again. I have less control of my thoughts. I am not living in the moment but constantly thinking about school stuff again, what to do next and what I might have forgotten.
Meditation is not about performing. There is no right or wrong way to do it. The most important thing is to relax, listen to your body and empty your mind. First times might feel odd and uncomfortable and you might have difficulties to concentrate. But this is normal. Just accept it.
After a few weeks everything looks and feels a bit different.
